i like this room, i'd like on like this. Today, Wow. Sunday was nice though.. i slept forever and dreamt forever too. went and bathed in ginger bath oils till my hands and feet were wrinkled listening to connor oberst and then sat infront of the computer finding myself looking up different more tastey ways to making vegan salad - I'm not vegan or anything I just like the food- Ahhhh I'v got so much shit to do at school at the moment, So many assignments and things i have to catch up on and i'm finding myself actually caring. and im on a ride of overload! Lastnight i made a list of things i needed to do for school and assignments that were coming up and a shopping list. .Toilet paper! .Veg/salad .Milk .bread .chicken On another note, I'v been getting into alot of roots music . Alot of reggae. 3 weeks mums back.

because you had looked at me with eyes that had seen more of me then myn and for once i wasn't afraid of what you would find. so far away i can't even taste you. Are you missing a stranger you might of loved do you feel like theres something you dont feel enough. theres a perfectly good poison for the eperfectly numb.

a mind can only race and a heart can only beat.

i feel like avacado and lemon salad.

Art class. uh assignment is 4/5 .3 minimum abstract expressionism paintings on different size canvas's of our interpretation of natural life. Ahhh (: love life.

Ryan Adams - i cant/ i dont really listen to him anymore, But was watching true blood and distinctivly heard his voice being played in the background of a car scene.how i miss him. -1974

The sun is shining hard at my feet And the city is an animal ready to eat It's raining like a nose bleed, cigarettes and sweets And I feel it coming on Bloody as the day I was born It's 1974 Just like the day I was born It's 1974 She isn't crazy She's just not impressed She stabs me with her eyes Dirty knives hidden in her dress And it's raining like bombs in my room when I'm alone And I swear I think I knew you before Just like the day I was born. -burning photographs I finally see the light Down on the east side Wasted like a memory If I had a car I'd drive Straight off the bridge into the river, it would empty me Pretty pictures in a magazine Everybody is so make believe, it's trueI used to be sad Now I'm just bored with you You're doomed to repeat the past' Cause nothing is gonna lastI burned all of your photographs Traffic sings the songs Inviting me in to dodge the bullets from an empty gunIf I had a car I'd drive straight into the window of a bank I owed money to that good sort of music when your heart ache's. and if it doesnt it'll start. ha

heh. yet again another 3am night. woke at 8.30 to aprils message 'wakey wakey E may. 1 because your coming to school today!' heh. missed the first buss so had to catch the late one which resulted in missing half of Art first period.. but i had got to my class room and a note on the door read "Art class p1 go to hall" as i got closer to the hall i heard the melody of young folks, turns out chasing bailey had come to our school. whaaaaat! they'r known as pop country band now they are playing indie beats.i just couldnt take it! -Sleep sleep sleep is nice sleep is good.I don't know, everytime i lay in bed all snugged up and my head well.. my head is just bopping & jopping with tunes and beats and by 3am i find myself on my loungeroom floor broken into all mums old vinals sitting jamming to Ella Fitzgerald and Billie Holiday.replaying sexy brass solo's. from anything to classic jazz to old dirty blues. Like i intend on going to bed and sleeping. just this overwhelming temptation takes over, I suppose i'm a little bitty lonely aswell. being home alone for 2 months grows on you. Music is all i know having mum and dad as musicians all my life theres never a quiet moment. somehow the music makes me feel like they are with me. Don't get me wrong being home alone and dancing around the house naked on sundays to the doors "COOMMMEEEE ONNN BABBBBYY LIGGGHHT MY FIIRREEE ' 'HELLO I LOOVEEE YOU WON'T YOU TELL ME YOURRR NAME' is lovely. Just Not that mum was ever a 'stay home' mum or anything.. they are never home.. just that reasureing sound of mum trying to brake into the door at afterhours settled me. and thats what feels like home. Which reminds me! i have to pay dad a visit soon in newy. I miss his magic and recording studio.. ahh the lovely essence of pot soon as you walk in. -I'm thinking about getting Bettie page painted on my double bass possibly something like the above but with her waiste around the curves of my bass as to look as if they are hers.(Bettie Page ;sexy 1950's sex symbol -started the bowl bob fringe- goes along with the rokabilly style of my bass) ahh ahhh.

I would like some new lace up boots. lots. These are a couple i'v been browsing $$$

fuck off society and culture, i would not like to descuss the reasons why societys are such pricks for the next hour and a half. 2.15am my sleeping pattern is slaughtering me, I don't know how i'm going to get up in the morning and make it for the bus by 8. chant chant chant. Also pick up your fucking rubbish before you go to class. Im happy today,no, yes really.

pyramid song; Radiohead

I jumped in the river and what did I see? Black-eyed angels swam with me A moon full of stars and astral cards AND All the figures I used to see All my lovers were there with me All my past and futures And we all went to heaven in a little row boat There was nothing to fear and nothing to doubt I jumped into the riverBlack-eyed angels swam with me A moon full of stars and astral cards AND All the figures i used to see All my lovers were there with me All my past and futures And we all went to heaven in a little row boat There was nothing to fear and nothing to doubt There was nothing to fear and nothing to doubt There was nothing to fear and nothing to doubt

circus. Hokus pokus

I have allways wanted to go to the circus ever since I once went with mum and dad. The glitter the lights the outfits the noise the amazement and the tamed wild aniimals the dressed up ladys with feathers on their heads and the bicycles. the looks me mum and dad would exchange eachother once something crazy and amazing would happen. ;I just started thinking today about when I was small and when everything wasn't gigantic and real where mum and dads didnt have biffs and where my imagination was wilder then ever. the circus reminds me of that place. my dads a magician.

Browsing Oyster mag.

I didnt do and just watched the world today,

i want to reach out.

i felt like a gypsy today.